Monday, July 29, 2013

Name Game

All this royal baby fever and talk about baby names has got me thinking about names a lot too. Namely Jacob's name. More precisely, whether or not we chose the right name for Jacob.

Out of the three kids, Jacob's name was by far the hardest to come up with. So hard, in fact, he had no name for three days. The NICU nurses just called him Twin B because we were at a loss. And it's not like we didn't have time to prepare. It's just... so hard to pick a name. We were careful to make sure the names we chose didn't render themselves to become burdens down the road. Adam was very good at making sure names couldn't be used against the kids once they were in school and name calling becomes an issue. Let's be real, Colin would just be called Colon. (No offense to all the Colins out there. I hope no meanies call you Colon.) Plus we wanted something meaningful, preferably named after family, because those seem like the most meaningful of all. Sofia's name was easy to come up with. We decided on that one pretty quickly. I loved that it is the same in Italian and English, just like my name. We hadn't even discussed a middle name but when the subject came up, I already told Adam I had a good idea for one. Angela. Named after Adam's sister - the last female born on that side of the family until our Sofia came along. Yup. Just a bunch of nephews for Adam. He loved it. And Angie, Adam's sister, was moved to tears when we told her, the day she met baby Sofia.

Thomas' name was easy too. Adam's uncle, Thomas, passed away not too long before the boys came around. He was a great man and we thought it would be nice to name one of our boys after him. We hadn't really decided which boy was going to get which name, we just figured the first one to come out would be Thomas and the second would be......

Trying to find a male Italian name that wasn't too Italian was virtually impossible. Vincenzo. Salvatore. Federico. Stefano. Nope. Nope. Nope. And no thank you. But I kinda wanted something that at least hinted to being Italian. I really wanted the name Dominic. I kept pining for that name for the entire pregnancy and beyond. Adam was not a fan. "It sounds like the villain off a soap opera!" That's Lorenzo, but still. He was definitely in the minority. Everyone seemed to love that name. Except for Adam. Every other name we came up with as a possibility just didn't move me the way Dominic did. Other names were okay, but did I like them as much as Dominic? No. Plus if we wanted to, we could call them Tom and Dom. Yes? Now it was down to crunch time. We were admitted into the hospital. These babies would be here in less than three days and one of them is still nameless. "Are you SURE you don't like Dominic?" I was not giving up. Adam may have relented eventually if nothing more than to just shut me up, but can I really do that to him? Make him name his child something he will dislike for always? Every time he'd say Dominic's name he'd think about how he really didn't like it and he felt pressured to agree because it was what I wanted. What an awful thing to do. This baby was remaining nameless until we came up with something we would both agree on.

The lists of names we reviewed and compiled and discussed were overwhelming. Finally it came down to four names. Theodore, William,  Gabriel, and Dominic. (I told you I wasn't relenting). We even tried to let Sofia pick out the name. How cool would that be? Your little sister got to pick out your name! She went with Theodore, although to be honest, I'm not really sure her just-turned-three-year-old mind could really process what we were requesting of her. Theodore it is! Tom and Ted. And then my mom tried to say Theodore. FAIL. "What are you naming him? Tayodore?" Nope. That's not going to work. Back to the drawing board.  It's just as well. Jacob doesn't really look like a Theodore to me anyway. Why is this so difficult?!?

Because it is a huge responsibility. This is something that is going to shape your child. They are kinda stuck with the name you pick for at least 18 years. I guess if they really hated it they could change it at that point. But most often, they are stuck with it for life. That's a long time. I'm sure we are not the only family that has struggled in trying to come up with their baby's name. That's why there are hundreds upon hundreds of baby naming books and websites. None of which were any help to us!

So along come our sweet boys. Thomas Everitt and ? At least we knew Baby B's middle name would be Anthony. We actually had known that all along. At about day two when we still couldn't decide, we were very close to just going with Anthony as a first name. But that's my brother's name. Then what in the world would we do for a middle name? Finally on day three I decided this was just ridiculous and we were going to sit down and come up with a name before we did anything else. No eating. No TV watching. No bathroom breaks. This is serious business. Then out of no where Adam says, "What about Jacob? That's what we were going to name Sofia if she was a boy." Sold! Instantly I knew that was our baby's name. It was an automatic approval. I didn't even register I was agreeing until I heard myself agreeing. It was like picking out a wedding dress. You've tried on 1700 dresses and then as soon as you put number 1701 on, something clicks. This is the one. Jacob Anthony. I was cool with that. He looked like a Jacob to me. Name plaque made, papers signed, birth certificate ordered.

And then the second-guessing begins. Jacob? Are we sure? That is the most popular boy's name for the past several years. Do we want Jacob to have to be one of three Jacobs in his classroom each year? How uncreative of us. It doesn't even mean anything to us. It's not a family name. It's just same name we agreed upon. Jacob Anthony does have a nice ring to it though.

ARG!

All in all I think we picked fabulously. Thomas means twin and Jacob was a twin biblically speaking. Jacob also means, to follow, which he did being Twin B. That's pretty fortunate their names are both twin related. It's the trouble we had in picking the name that is causing me to question our choice, not the choice itself. The fact that it took us so long decide makes me wonder why it was so easy to agree. It must have been meant to be, right? Jacob is a strong name. A good name. It's classic. My mom can say it. What if I had to pick another name? Is there really something I like better? Would I change Jacob's name to something else? Do I wish I would have named him something different?

No. Not really. Because when I look into Jacob's sweet face and those dark black eyes, he looks like a Jacob to me. It feels right. And really, it's just a name.

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